Right, I’ve a question for you guys. It comes with a kinda back story/lead in…
My wife (the Bear), handed me what can only be described as a pink dog leash the other day that she’d found while cleaning out somewhere around the house. (Now we have pink dog leashes in the house so I was puzzled as to why I was handed it as we weren’t going out or anything at the time).
“Would you use that?”, she said inquisitively
‘Huh? it’s a dog leash, that I’ve used before’, I thought, ‘Why would she be asking me this?’
So, I took a second look at it….
This wasn’t the dog leash, it’s some kind of harness.
There before me was a baby harness!! I get a shiver saying those words. To me they just don’t go together (Baby.. Harness… Baby… Harness….Nope!!!).
I prefer my babies ‘free range’ thank you very much.
To be honest I was more than a bit surprised by my wife’s suggestion. I get it; it’s a safety mechanism so toddlers don’t run out under cars at busy roads or get lost in large crowds but surely being strapped up and treated like a domesticated pet has some kind of effect on a kid! I never expect her to say, “Can you put the child in a cage, we’re bringing her to the vets”, but her casual “would you use that?” question may as well have been that exact sentence in the impact it had inside my body.
Look, I know there's an argument to say cots and play pens are essentially cages but I've grown up with them as a norm. It got me thinking...Is this the only reason that my body rejects this 'child leash'? if it was marketed properly and enough influencer type parents used them would I become convinced? Will future generations think it to be normal?
Maybe I’m preconditioned this way. Maybe I’m resisting ground-breaking innovation in the same way I’d poke fun at others resisting life improving modern technologies. I come from a long line of stubborn men
(for years I wouldn’t eat carrot cake because the 2 words don’t go together. Carrott…..Cake….Carrott….Cake.....Nope!! Hmmmm, I’m sensing a pattern here).
The Bear (my wife) researches everything and when I say everything, I mean, everything (it drives me a little mad to be honest). I reckon it’s a condition of some sort, a like ‘having to know every permeable outcome to things way in advance’ type condition. The kind that makes you stress out about sh*t that may never happen.
It’s a bit like the people who diagnose their own illnesses on WebMD, you know what I mean, ‘I’ve a tickly cough, haven’t been sleeping well and my pee is a funny colour’………. ‘You have bubonic plague’
*disclaimer; the Bear doesn’t have bubonic plague or any of the above symptoms (as far as I know)
Anyway, I would have thought that this would be something she’d have checked out, as I said she researches everything else (and to be fair she’s usually ‘bang on the money’) and I would have thought her research would have come back with:
‘Are you serious? It’s a child not a dog!!’ as a result.
This had me double puzzled so I decided to do a bit of research myself.
And are you ready for it? I’ve come to this conclusion;
.......I’m not a good researcher.
Instead of finding the arguments for both sides I ended up spending about an hour laughing at pictures of kids in the these 'harnesses' and memes on the topic, which I’ve attached to this blog, for ‘research purposes’.
Maybe I can be convinced, tell me, have you used one of these harnesses?
Did you find them good?
Am I mad thinking like this?
Or are the ‘harness folks’ the looney ones?
Oh and here's those photos and jokes…..